I got to thinking….the world is passing me by …I can’t keep up ….my knees are too bad. So when do you start to think ‘maybe I’ve just been around too long?’ Here are some clues:
when you don’t know any of the songs on American Idol
When you don’t recognize anyone on the ‘red carpet’
When you put your cup of coffee/tea in the frig instead of the microwave to warm it up
When you’re very good at opening childproof caps…. with a hammer
When you take a nap at 4 in the afternoon against your will
When you have your own teeth but they’re mostly fillings
When you call customer service for help and get someone who can speak English, but can’t understand English.
When you are not shy to ask for a ‘senior discount’
When you have to get up 3-4 times in the night to go
When you’re only cranky when it comes to traffic, waiting, children, politicians, customer service and know-it-alls
When you find yourself saying, ‘excuse me?’ or ‘huh?’ too many times
When you’re wrinkled, saggy and lumpy, and that’s just your left leg
When you have trouble remembering simple words like… uh…
When you’re the life of the party… as long as it doesn’t last past 8pm
When anyone under thirty years of age looks like they’re twelve
When you used to drive five miles over the speed limit and now drive five miles under
When you find yourself talking back to the automated voice while you’re on hold
Mostly I am poking fun at myself. The upside of things is that, in this last quarter of my life,
I have to put up with…..damn little!!!
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